Call it faith with a family address
Call it belief that smells like a particular kitchen. Neptune in Cancer in the 9th house binds meaning to belonging, so the traditions that move you are the ones with people and memory in them, and an argument for a position you feel no kinship with will never persuade you.
Two facts of different sizes sit here. The era supplied the harbour-shaped longing; your birth hour supplied the 9th house, and that is where it went to work — on belief and the wider world rather than on your actual household.
A tradition you could simply belong to
The picture underneath is of being inside something: a community with a shared practice, people who have been doing this for generations, a place where you are expected. It is a genuine human need and it is rarely available on demand. Where you cannot find it, building a small version with a few people is more achievable than looking for the large one.
The pull back, and what it is actually about
However far you go, something keeps drawing you towards what you came from — the language, the observances, the place, the version of the world you were raised inside. Sometimes that is a genuine return and sometimes it is homesickness wearing a philosophical costume. Ask which, honestly, before making a large decision on the strength of it.
They read the reverence as not having thought about it
Your attachment to a tradition is emotional as well as intellectual, and people who lead with argument take the emotion as evidence that no argument occurred. Traditions differ enormously on how much weight feeling should carry here, and this site takes no side on that. What is worth saying is your own reasoning out loud, since it exists and nobody can hear it.
Write down what you chose rather than inherited
Much of what you hold arrived before you could evaluate it, and some of it you have since chosen deliberately, and the two are now indistinguishable from inside. Separate them once, in writing. The chosen ones are the ones you can defend and pass on; the inherited ones may be worth keeping anyway, and they should be kept knowingly.
Meaning is a place you can go back to
What holds your life together is not a doctrine but a set of returns: the same festival, the same coast, the same words said at the same time of year. That is a legitimate and durable structure. Protect the returns actively, since they will not survive on their own once the people who organised them are no longer doing so.
You need work that feels like it belongs to somebody
Abstract organisations leave you cold; work with a community attached — a place, a group of people, a lineage of some kind — brings out considerably more from you. That is a real preference to select for. Choose the smaller organisation with people in it over the larger one with a better mission statement.
You want somebody who understands where you came from
A partner who cannot feel the significance of your background will always be slightly foreign to you, however much you love them, and this surfaces at exactly the moments that matter most. Take them there rather than explaining it. What cannot be described can often be shown, and being shown changes people.
Leaving the family's beliefs felt like leaving the family
Where you moved away from what your household held, it was not experienced as an intellectual disagreement on either side; it was felt as a departure. That is why the subject is still difficult decades later. Say clearly that the leaving was not about them. It may not be believed and it needs to have been said.
Being far from home costs you more than it costs others
Long absences, emigration, extended travel — these have a physical cost for you that people around you do not experience, and it presents as an unaccountable low-grade unwellness rather than as homesickness. Build regular returns into any life that takes you far away, and treat them as maintenance rather than as a luxury.