Who does the household revolve around
Who does the household actually revolve around, and was that ever decided? With the North Node in Aquarius in the 4th house, home is supposed to run as something closer to a commons than a court. You need one domestic arrangement where you are not at the centre.
Nobody chose the current arrangement; it assembled itself around whoever had the strongest presence. Households organised that way work perfectly well and leave everybody else slightly small.
Not being the centre feels like being sidelined
When the household stops orbiting you, the first sensation is exclusion rather than relief, and the reflex is to reassert. Sit through it. What is actually happening is that other people have started taking up their own space, which is what you said you wanted and does feel odd for a month.
Give one domestic decision away entirely
Start with something visible: a room, a routine, a recurring occasion that becomes somebody else's to run, with no input and no correction from you. Then live with the result even in the places where it is plainly worse. The exercise is the complete absence of your input rather than the quality of the eventual outcome.
Reorganising it back around your schedule
The retreat is gravitational: within a few weeks the household has rearranged itself around your hours, your preferences and your requirements, and nobody decided that either. Check the domestic calendar once a season, honestly. If everything else moves whenever your plans move, the arrangement has quietly reverted to exactly what it was before.
A household of equals
What accumulates is a home where several people have standing rather than one where everybody accommodates a centre. It is less warm in the short term and considerably more durable over decades: nobody in it is waiting around to be considered, and the resentments that accumulate under a court arrangement never get started at all.
Let the family be a group, not an audience
In your household you have been the one people watch, please and organise around, which is comfortable for you and slightly diminishing for them. Ask each person what they want from the coming year and then take all of the answers equally seriously. Being one member among several is the position on offer here, and it is not a demotion.
A home built on stated principles
Most households run on inherited habit and whoever feels most strongly about a thing. Yours could run on something agreed instead: what this home is for, how people are treated in it, what everybody can expect. Write it down with the people who live there. It sounds bureaucratic and it changes the atmosphere permanently.
A house that is not performing
Keeping the home presentable for an imagined visitor is a continuous background task, and the tiredness it produces is easy to attribute elsewhere. Let one part of the house be entirely unpresentable for a whole month. What returns is a domestic space you can genuinely relax inside rather than one you are permanently maintaining.
Open the house to more people
Your hospitality is curated: chosen guests, arranged occasions, an evening that goes well because you planned it. Try the open version — more people, less selection, nobody in charge of how it goes. It is chaotic and it produces the specific kind of belonging a well-run dinner party has never once delivered.
Work should not set the household clock
The rest of the house plans around your professional calendar, an arrangement that was never proposed to anybody and never refused. Fix two domestic commitments that no work matter is allowed to move, for a full year. Redistributing that has more effect on a household than any conversation about fairness, and it takes one entry in a shared calendar.