Partnership is how you make a family
A Cancer Jupiter working out of the 7th house hands you attachments that turn domestic almost immediately: what you want from another person is not company but kinship. Arrangements that stay casual leave you unsettled. What this needs is a bond you are permitted to depend on.
The growth arrives through belonging to somebody. Your circumstances have generally improved when you were properly attached, materially as much as otherwise, and the flat stretches in your life line up with the periods when nobody was expecting you home.
Looking after them is your opening move
Within weeks of meeting somebody you are noticing what they need and quietly providing it, well before either of you has decided anything. It is extremely persuasive and it establishes the shape of the whole relationship. Hold the caring back for a month, because what you find out in that month is whether they were ever going to look after you.
Their family became yours
You attach to the whole household rather than to the person: the parents, the siblings, the traditions, the ordinary Sunday. That is unusual and it is genuinely valued by them. It also means an ending would take a great deal with it. Keep your own side of the arrangement equally alive, since a life absorbed entirely into somebody else's family has nowhere to go back to.
Closeness and responsibility are hard to separate
You can spend years believing you are devoted when you are largely obliged, because both feel like the same warmth from inside. Nobody can settle this for you. Ask what you would still choose if they needed nothing at all, and answer it honestly rather than kindly, because the difference decides the next decade.
You do not raise the difficult thing
Rather than risk the atmosphere, you absorb the grievance and carry it, sometimes for years, and it surfaces eventually as distance rather than as an argument. That is the standing risk in this position. Say the smaller version early, while it is still a preference rather than a verdict, because the accumulated version cannot be said kindly.
You are the one who holds two families together
Both households now rely on you to remember, to invite and to smooth over, and neither of them has any idea how much arranging is involved. It is skilled work and it is entirely unpaid. Hand one occasion a year over completely, including the parts you would do better, since the role only becomes visible when somebody else attempts it.
You become yourself in relation to somebody
Your development happens inside attachment rather than alone: you understand what you think, want and can do by being close to another person. Solitary stretches leave you strangely unformed. That is not a weakness to be corrected, though it does mean choosing well matters enormously. Pick somebody whose ordinary week you would be content to inherit.
You will fund the household before yourself
In any shared arrangement your income goes towards the joint life first and your own needs afterwards, and you have rarely checked whether the other person is doing the same. It is generous and it is unexamined. Look at the last twelve months honestly, since a household where one person always goes without stops being generous and becomes an arrangement.
Being kept is what you are actually asking for
What settles you is not passion but permanence: the sense that this person is not going anywhere and that you may relax. Say that plainly rather than testing for it, because testing produces reassurance and reassurance is not the same as being told. Ask directly what they intend, and let the answer count.
Your friends came through your partners
A large part of your circle arrived attached to somebody you were with, and some of them stayed after the relationship did not. That is a real social achievement and it leaves your friendships oddly dependent on your romantic history. Build two friendships this decade that have nothing to do with anybody you have loved.